We grieve for what we hoped could be, for what we hoped was possible. Grief arises with force when our hope for what was possible is no longer.
I have many folks come to me, confused by why their grief is so intense. Perhaps they grieve a relationship that was estranged, or a family member who was abusive towards them, or something they know wasn’t ultimately good for them, yet they are deeply affected.
This is a form of disenfranchised grief, in which we (or others) diminish the worthiness of our own experience. And it is likely that we are grieving the relationship we hoped for, the father we always wanted, the family we thought we could have one day, or some success we always dreamed was out there for us.
This is a worthy form of grief—to grieve what we hoped was possible.
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